Tuesday, June 23, 2009

When truth hurts.....

Truth hurts more when your in denial.
Truth hurts when someone throws it in your face consistently.
Truth hurts when you decline to face actuality.
Truth hurts too much when its your love one that knows.
But truth stop hurting when you face your own fears, detour on the right path...and stop making excuses for what you should've or could've done.

Thursday, May 7, 2009

Ive been Tagged.........

Hey Ive been tagged with this Honesty Award for the first time on this blog. Although Ive been tagged with this award twice on Oyins world...but the first time here...yeaaaaaaaaaah. I was tagged by the lovely......Joyunspeakable. Okay from the name I too thought that this was a female. After reading the blog I learned that this is a man that shares a blog with (2) women. Hmmm, very interesting...but I like it.

I suppose to first list the rules and then tell somethings about me so here are the rules...I hope I can follow them correctly.....

1.You must brag about the award - Check
2.You must include the name of the blogger who bestowed the award on you and link back to the blogger - Check
3.You must choose a minimum of seven (7) blogs that you find brilliant in content or design.

4.Show their names and links and leave a comment informing them that they were prized with Honest Weblog.

5.List at least ten (10) honest things about yourself. Then pass it on with the instructions.

Anyways, I am suppose to tell ten things about myself....interesting enough I didnt do this with the other awards. So, I guess this may or may not be of interest to many.....

1.) Well I am a mother of 4...the oldest being 18 and the youngest being 7. Although they all drive me crazy can you believe that I do want (one) more child.

2.) I am very much addicted to Mafia War on Facebook. Join my mafia...(shar battle)!

3.) I am soooooooooo in love with someone that I shouldnt be. This is crazy love and I need and feel like I need to let him go but I just cant. Im fighting myself everyday with this love thing.

4.) I am a seafood addict....its like crack to me. If I dont have seafood in a week, somebody's in trouble. SO watch the fuk out!

5.) At night I get really lonely...well on holidays, birthdays.....and most days. Im lonely!

6.) I am the biggest flirt in the world. I can win anyone with my eyes and my big beautiful smile.

7.) I dont like or read looooooooooooong postings on blog. I kinda skim through it to see if there are keywords that are interesting....well you know, I wont say. But anyways if its not interesting then I will just say nice blog or nicely written... :)

8.) I have been watching my weight and within the past year Ive lost 60 pounds. I was 320 and now Im 260..........SWEEEEEEEEEEET!

9.) I need a "real" boyfriend.....o stop by my other blog to see what I expect from a boyfriend.

10.) Lastly....hmmm, its gotta be a good one. I prefer oral sex over everything else.......haha!

Now that you know 10 stupid.... (side eye) things about me. I have to tag seven of the people that I feel can be honest with "us" on their blog.. I think thats how it goes. Hmmm..... ( drum roll please)
  1. Kai- I chose Kai because not only because shes a sweet very very smart young lady. Shes my blog partner that has enhanced my blog pretty much so. I see much prosperity in you gurl!

  2. JB- I chose JB because I know hes in school but hes a lil private about himself...and yes, I want to be nosey and be ALL up in his

  3. Fuzzy- I chose Fuzzy cos he like to read others testimony...and NOW its your turn tell all.

  4. Ugandan girl- Ugandan girl has been my road dog from day one that I started this blog. She has sported me through all....umm, but wait she has somehow dissapeared. SO this is "your" wake up calling....

  5. Lady A- I havent gotten the chance to know this I think now is the time.

  6. Gayte-Keeper- I chose him because he is a blogger that I have become close to and actually gotten a chance to meet. He is very much genuine and very articulate. He is one guy that shows his strength through his words and I like that. I wont even mention cos we look cute together....SEE>>>>>

  1. Last but of course not the least Deonte K. I chose "D" cos he is another sweetie....he enjoys taking pics (still waiting) and I really admire him for who he is....Sorry to say that when I first went to his blog that we started on the wrong page but quickly recovered and moved forward with our friendship...thanks boo..muah!

Friday, May 1, 2009

My secret love and I

So and then we met...... I was so nervous at first but once I saw him it was like Id known him forever. I wasnt the shy girl that Im used to being when I first meet someone. He wasnt that tall although taller than me. He had the cutiest brown hair..hahaha. Okay whats cute about brown hair. But have you ever seen an African man with brown hair? lol

Everything turned out to be very fine. We went out and shopped, dined, and many strolls. I learned something new.....hahaha! Some man stood up and yelled " THANK YOU" towards me. I didnt know he was talking to me but Lekan explain to me that he was thanking me for showing my presence to him. Like he enjoyed looking at my! That was the laugh the rest of my stay with him. Lekan has a wonderful sister, and friends that were very warm and open towards me. So as I was leaving... there were many tears between the both of us.

Until then stay sweet Lekan...mauh!

Friday, March 13, 2009


Ive revealed my secret....

My long distances love.....

I'll never regret being close to him...

But life has to move on....

Im closing the life to this blog, for I no longer have secrets to tell....

Kai, Im so happy that I had the experience of sharing a blog with a wonderful, smart sister...

I love you and love all who supported Kai/Kinshars secret blog.....MUAH!!

please continue to visit me at my other blog

Sunday, February 22, 2009

see you here1-29-09

see you here

see you here

in my heart

i feel you

near, the closer you get

the wholeness i felt

i knew this feeling won't go away

you won't go away

cos i let you linger

my heart, my life

and you left your pieces of your being

everywhere in every place

i feel you

here with only me

why did you still love me?

you have felt me too

when i left my pieces of me there

in your soul......


©2009 Kai C.

Tuesday, February 10, 2009


Heres Kinshar's (Oyin's) secret.....
Kinshar got a crush.....
I fell in love with another blogger....
He and I were really close and talked all the time...
I knew that nothing would become of this relationship cos....
because of the age difference....
So how did this happen.....

We were suppose to be best friends, but ended up being lovers....
Our feelings grew over the months as the time progressed.....
I have to confess all now because it shouldnt have happened....
the way it did......
I was so sure that I could let him go as I told him....
I told him that he needs to move on to another girl that he would marry.....
Knowing it couldnt be me, I was ok with this decision.....
So he has now confessed to finding a girl.....
He loves her and she loves him as well.....

So know that he has started a new relationship with her....
I have decided to let go of the relationship with him ....
Im letting go to move on with my life as well....
I just need him to know that I still do care.....


Thursday, February 5, 2009

Im ready

Im ready to do everything he is ready for me to do...

Im ready to accept all his flaws cause I love him so....
Once Im in his arms, I ll be ready to kiss and hug him never letting him go....
Im ready
Im ready to move to the highest level in any relationship...
Im ready to focus on building a better life with him, and only him....
If only he would and could know my heart he would know that Im really ready....
and I hope hes ready too!!

Friday, January 30, 2009


love is like a catcher
you catch me
with your open arms
©2009 Kai C.

Thursday, January 22, 2009

Bringing closure.....

Well to end all well with my week,
got things to smile about....
I got a new president,
black he is....
stop babysitting my phone,
fell off to sleep.....
got my phone call,
three in the morning....
he was in some sort of accident,
so he explained.....
Its ok, you dont have to explain,
especially since hes not my man....
So here I am sitting here thinking,
how to end my day with a bang....
Any suggestions?

Tuesday, January 20, 2009

44th President 1/20/09

44th President 1/20/09

he came to this day
he will stand for his american people
as united states would lead the nation
there is a change
there is hope
there is faith
when obama walked into
a White House
he is the first black president
in this century
my family has gather around the big screen
watching history floats in air
clearly believe the eyes of ancestors
gazing down and beautifully shouts
from heavens
tears roll out of the souls
when he said his powerful speech

i came to see this man
who leads our people
on an auguaration day
when he became mr. president obama
at 12 noon
the faces of great happiness
cruise around the globe
i think i knew someday
someone who's black and lead this country
i even knew someday
a woman would become the president, too

44th president
44th black president
the world knows his name
chanting his name in the sky
Obama, Obama
in breaths of bliss
oh bless this freedom, bless my country
bless to be an american
red, white, blue

historian event
lingers my tongue
when i speak of change
while i saw people stood in the cold
cheering on and on
chanting Obama, Obama
through extraordinary moments of enthusiasm

smiles through winter
a lot of people ignores the cold
outside in D.C.
crying for joy
wearing Obama suvierners
being part of that beautiful american hisory
children in all races,
looking at this black man become the president in their generation
saying, "i want to be just like him"
anything is possible if we have faith in the way we change

it is a dream
Dr. King's dream realized
people came to the
National Mall
from each continent
like Africa, Asia, Europe
they wanted to see the history
being made
to their own eyes

as i watch this wonderful auguaration
my heart is filled with grace
not just his brown skin
but there is a change that takes the toll of America
it will take time

a beautiful emotion runs
on the freezy wind
as it carries our souls
and let us fly like an american eagle
lifting our spirits up
when we call him,
Mr. President now

while tears are streaming down
thinking, yes we we can
yes we will
we got Obama
in every swimming thought

President Obama
my President Obama
to this day
January 20, 2009
no one ever thought this day
that obama will run for office
but i knew a black man will run for presdential in United States
to me, it is like Christmas Day
with a first African American president
coming to the white house
who will bring change
in our people
in our country
in our world...
©2009 Kai C.